innan allting tar slut / before it all ends

täällä soi sanna ja lapset ja on tiistai. tässä on koira haudattuna. löydä se.

sanna and the kids are playing here. this post is a monkey business. find it.

jaa, oliko tää nyt tässä

Mullon vähä semmonen tunne, että kaikki on tässä paketissa nätisti nyt.´

Käyn tossa salilla vetäsemässä sarjat ja sitten katoon tonne yön pimeyteen. Lämmin syysyö ja samettinen merivesi.

o-ou

Oon hävittänyt kaukosäätimen.

Bookfair, Helsinki 25-28.10.

I got a tickets to Book-fair in Helsinki (i will work there in a stand of Rozentals-organization). So the best friends of mine will get tickets, if they prove to be my best friends :D

(haha, i bet i end up there alone with 4 un-used inviting cards).

I'm In The BAND!

I got this message just right now: Hellacopters is passing away. I want to thank about all the brilliant moments at home (with No Song Unheard) and at sweaty clubs (I'm in the Band) and scraming (Hey!) at the festivals.

But as always, I feel like one time in my life is passing with Hellat - but hey, I am in the band!

Things that Matter

I don't know - today I've been thinking three things: 1) Stolen credit-card numbers, 2) "academic" versus "normal" people and 3) KELA (why it haven't been paying my living cost help money yet).

So, probably some idiot asshole stole lots of credit card information from Kartenhaus.de - I bought Deftones ticket from there last spring. Concert was great, small arena and nice beer and nice host (thanks Annette!). But now I probably need to close my credit card. I will go to bank later today, so let's see and hear later.

I have get too much of academic talks lately. Studying in University doesn't make people anyhow more wiser nor better than not studying. I know some people who almost despise all the others, who are not studying (in the Uni, because in the Uni there is SOOO MUCH wiser and cooler people, only people who has brain!). It doesn't have to be accentuated that we have this and that cultural club where only the wise brainly academic people can join. Bullshit! I've met lot more wiser and cooler and delicate and witty people, who have never ever been in Uni (or any other school after high-school, one of these is Norwegian fella Björn! Ok, this doesn't mean that I think that I am studying without any sense and goal, but hey c'mon. Life is so much various than...

KELA stuff is just whining about money. I can do it and I can also live one month with 40e (after bills). So who cares.

Today to the Lithuanian lesson (I wanna learn some nice words, like Myliu! :D)

Life is a huge concentration camp.

Topic for today: Imre Kertész - Felszámolás (Lopetus, Liquidation)


IF YOUR LIFE WAS A MOVIE, WHAT WOULD THE SOUNDTRACK BE?
So, here's how it works:1. Open your library2. Put it on shuffle3. Press play4. For every question, type the song that's playing5. When you go to a new question, press the next button

Opening Credits: Mew - Panda
Waking Up: Pyhimys - Angervotien Ajattelija
First Day At School: Franz Ferdinand - Jacqueline
Falling In Love: Mew - Snowflake
Fight Song: Sigur Rós - Untitled 1 (a bit slow, beautiful - "perfect" Fight song)
Breaking Up: Antony & The Johnsons - Fistful of Love
Prom: Noir Desir - Ernestine
Life's Ok: Ryan Adams - Come Pick Me Up
Mental Breakdown: Beatles - Blackbird
Driving: Hellacopters - No Song Unheard
Flashback: Tehosekoitin - Maailma on sun
Getting Back Together: Secred Chiefs 3 - Hagia Sophia
Birth of Child: Tiktak - Heilutaan
Wedding: Arcade Fire - Une Année Sans Lumieré
Final Battle: Placebo - Without You I'm Nothing
Death Scene: The White Stripes - Seven Nation Army
Funeral Song: Deftones - Be Quiet And Drive
Credits: Mew - Comforting Sounds

Echoes, Silence, Patience & Grace

Seems to be that all the crazy people are calling today here. I've been listening for stories about procents and most of all: tomorrow there will be somekind of alien invasion coming! I'm waiting! I'm curious of this now. Also, it will be raining snow, in Helsinki, if I would believe these people. I was checking, whether it is full moon (it drives some people reaaally crazy, we got lotsa more calls about strange stuff at that time) but it is not. So more reasonable is then that something extraordinal will happen and these people know it already.

Party was and went. Nothing more to say.

I am feeling blue (suprise, suprise). I am somehow really angry towards other people, i think most of the people are useless. And not even funny. People, all, even me, is just these piece of shit's. People cannot do any decisions by theirselves, they cannot say: I was wrong, they cannot forgive. Me: I cannot reach any friends nowadays, I just stay and stay and stay. I am too tired to kick others asses forward. And feeling that I am not enough for anything. Such a Nice feeling. And a thruth.

if i could, i still miss you (Like It Or Not)

Huh, I am at work. I wanted to write about Tampere and scent of autumn. Right now I am having my own time: eating coconut-quark and listening Radio Helsinki. This morning was the first, when I wore winter boots, it was +4 while I walked to work. Soon it will be minuses. But back to the stuff.

So I went to Tampere for ethnomusicology master-seminar. We had only two topics on that on going hours, other was really important to me: we talked about my thesis. I was suprised how well the teachers were reacting towards my plans. They encouraged me to keep on doing all the stuff I have been already doing: I have the research question already and now I should just start to read read (about fandom, marketing, interaction, street-teams) and slowly start to interview the people who are into street-team marketing. Teachers guided to choose one smaller community/record company who makes street-team marketing. Spurring lesson indeed.

In Tampere there was also some other stuff why I stayed over night. Freshmen party at Uni. and I wanted to meet some friends (Maria and Jukka) and my little sister Marjaana. With Marjaana we saw soundcheck of J. Karjalainen's Lännen Jukka in Telakka. It was awesome, Ninni Poijärvi on violin and Mika Kuokkanen on a guitar. We were so suprised that later on that night I called Marjaana whether she would like to go to the concert itself, so she did and we went. Jii told stories about Lännen Jukka, who went as a young guy to America, to look for nothing special. He came back from there with lotsa stories and with finno-american music (awesome, great, excellent style). Later on he teached stuff to J. Karjalainen and now he made the songs again. We loved version of Piupali Paupali! (It's a traditional finnish children song which our granny and mom and i bet, sometimes even my dad used to sing while we were kids, it starts with this: Who are you young fellas, I don't know your names ;)

In Tampere there was this other thing as well. Scent of an autumn. While Crazy Days in Stockmann, there is always a fresh doughnuts and the smell of that flows around the centre. It reminded me about times I was living in Tampere, some good things there. But guess what: I have never ever tried those doughnuts, I bet they're great. Memories, memories!

This week has passed by really fastly, preparations for the party and school stuff has taken all my energy and now I should keep partying today. My other sister Pauliina with her boyfriend Heikki and my little brother Sampsa will come to our party: I have heard the rumours about Esmeralda (from The Hunchback of Notre Dame), Chicago Gangster and Peter Pan are coming as well. I hope things goes well, cakes, salads and punch are soon ready. Before that I need to work 3,5hours more, clean up rest of the flat and sleep couple of hours. I didn't get enough sleep last nite.

helan går?

I'm at home. I should be sleeping. It wont work this way. Tomorrow morning, works at 07.30am. Its almost twelwe in the evening now. Or night. And my Kent cd is broken. And I cannot get sleep. I am going to take some meds.

And.

I DO NOT KNOW what to do withmyself.

Wish me luck for tomorrow. Tampere brought back my strange hangovers.

Preparing for the Fairytales

Like I might told, we're going to have a fairytale-costume-party at home on a coming weekend. We have been preparing for the party. Lots of ideas for decoration (well, you'll see all the magic mushrooms, rose garlands, coffins, tiipii's, totem...) are being accomplished.

Today we're going to get some more stuff for the party to make it even better from the Recycling Centre. We also need chairs, because the girl who had kitchen chairs, moved out. I feel excited. I have lots of ideas but they're too expensive to carry through.

Well, my mom is also planning to drop by in Helsinki with two of my sisters and a hmm "brother-in-law". Maybe they will join for the costume-party as well! ;) Hey, IF you're reading this now and thinking why I haven't been invited, I invite you now. All the friends are welcome!

I have fell in love. Again. With same stuff.

Broken Bronze

I woke up too early to see that things are breaking up around me. I haven't been doing nothing special (seeing movies: Shaun of the Dead and Schindler's List, writing research plan for my MA-thesis).

But the thing, yesterday morning (afternoon in my case) a bird flow into my room. It was panicked, I was panicked (small birds, they can peck off your eyes!!!!). Hannele opened the window more wide, so this one small great blue tit (what a name in English, Talitintti!) flew away. I managed to get over that, but today. I went for shower really normally but somewhere in the middle I heard metal's clatter and half of my ring (from U.) was rolling on the floor. Other part of it clinged on my finger looking really really sad.

Now it is in two parts on my dresser. I feel naked without ring (well, quite easily then, hehe). But is this now somehow just a signs everywhere. FORGET. FORGET. And where should I get on, when I don't know much about myself either. Is there some expedients? Who knows? I don't. By the way, last SMG album (as well as second last) are brilliant. I don't have the later yet, but... huh.

Volga, Mombasa ja muita karaokehittejä

No en oo laulanut viime lauantain jälkeen karaokea, tosin sillon repäistiin Töölön Lippiksellä kaikki hitit I will staysta aina Kenen joukoissa seisothiin. Ei siitä sen enempää.

Elämme jänniä aikoja. Torstaina söin ensikertaa asioita (mm. omenaa, rapua, salaaattia, kananmunaa) riisipaperissa vietnamilaisittain sekä kotitekoista sushia (merileväkuoressa riisiä, avokadoa, raakaa lohta sekä riisiä, kurkkua ja raakaa tonnikalaa) . Asialla oli Jung-Joo kämppis. Ostin jätskit jälkkäriks ja Suvi ja Hane hankki viinit.

Perjantain olin töissä. Pelasin Sly3:sta. Kivaa oli. Kun tulin kotiin, Sussi soitti. Halusi juoda kaljaa. Lupauduin. Juteltiin paljon ja kohta Aurakin oli taas kylässä. Jatkettiin matkaa baarin kautta Looseen. Ja sitten kotiin. Olin siellä jotain puoli kaksi.

Nyt olen ollut tunnin töissä. Kaikki menee hyvin, jos Makasiinit eivät ala taas palaa.

Suunnitelmissa on lähinnä lepoa ja leffaa. Leffaseuralaisia voitaisiin ottaa. Mulla on henkilökunta-ale Finnkinolle.

kivenkoloista kaulalle.

I'm sorry. Today I need to write in Finnish. I am so pissed.

Noin. Viimepäivinä arvatenkin ei ole tapahtunut yhtään mitään. Olen ajellut raitiovaunulla Punavuoreen päin. Iso-Roobertinkadulle. Kävin Stupidoilla maanantaina, ostin SMG:n edellisen (Sen missä on se - kivenkoloista kaulalle). Yliopistolla kerran hakemassa 18opintopistettä Latvian kieleen ja kulttuuriin. Oli helppo saalis. Ois nyt perus- ja aineopinnot kasassa. Enää pari vitun vaikeaa peruskurssia ja se gradu.. Se G.

No joo. Mua vituttaa monesta syystä, ei vähiten se että olen vieläkin kipeänä. Eilen mittasin 38 astetta, tänään en edes ole viitsinyt. Kuolispa pois luonnostaan, niin tarvitsisi miettiä sitäkin. Lähdin tänään Tampereelle. Ei olisi pitänyt. Kaikki meni hyvin siihen asti kunnes pääsin yliopistolle. KV-toimistossa ei todellakaan ollut taaskaan ketään (ne jaksaa jankuttaa, että mun pitäis henkilökohtaisesti tuoda se saatanan vaihtopaperi, mutta miten mä voin tuoda, jos ne ei ole itse paikalla toimistoaikana --- tätä on kokeiltu jo kolmesti). En meinannut löytää Linnaa, jätin maksamatta kahvin, kun se järjestelmä on ihan perseestä.

Ja sitten. Se graduseminaari (MIKÄ VITUN GRADUSEMINAARI TOMMONEN ON?!) . Mulle on ihan sama lukeeko joku gradusetä mun blogia (mikä olis harvinaista), mutta että oikeesti. Hei me ollaan viimeisen vaiheen opiskelijoita, joilta puuttuu yks tutkimusharjoittelu (eli g, eli gradu, eli Master's Thesis). Ei mun mielestä ole reilua, että mä matkustan Tampereelle kertomaan muille, mitä ovat hakukoneessa YES, OR, NOT -vaihtoehdot. MÄ EN SAA SIITÄ PALKKAA niinkuin joidenkin pitäisi... Enkä saanut edes esiteltyä omaa kohtaani, kuten kaikki muut. Seuraavalla kerralla uusi aihe. Jos toi kurssi ei olisi pakollinen, niin luuletteko oikeasti että istuisin jauhamassa paskaa ihmisten kanssa, joita ei kiinnosta. Tottakai, pidän itseäni ihan mahtavana ja ylivoimaisena tyyppinä (NOT).

Noh, se oli 12,5 EURO kertaa 2, mun budjetista (n.100EURO ylimääräiseen toimintaan kuussa, kuten ruokailuun) kankkulan kaivoon. Onneksi Anita otti kyytiin ja vei Hämeenlinnaan asti, tulomatka oli 4 EUROA halvempi. Anitan kanssa puhuttiin seminaarin turhuudesta, ihmissuhteiden vaikeudesta (ei oikeasti jaksa etsiä miestä baarista tai mistään, kun tietää että omat rimat on jo liian korkealla ja kakkosia ois enää saatavilla). Haaveilin luontoon muuttamisesta, kysyin jopa Anitalta, olisko Hämiksessä meidän alalle sopivaa työtä tarjolla. Ei vissiin paljon, oli Anitan arvio.

Mun junan lähtöön oli n. 50minuuttia. Päätin tehdä kävelyretken omakotitaloalueella Hämeenlinnassa. Se teki hyvää. Ajatukset seuraa ajatuksia. Junassa opiskelin liettuaa. Ja sain Jennalta tekstiviestin, että pitäisi Looseen. Mikäänhän mua ei vitutuksessa estä. Kävin ja otin aika monta aika vähään aikaan. Ja Loosen Pete tietää jo, että mä juon nelosta. Loosessa soitti Ville Malja Lapkoa akustisesti. Kuulosti erikoiselta, erilaiselta, hyvältä. Päivän hyvä hetki.

Kotona mua odotti kirje verotoimistosta. Ei siitä sen enempää. Musta vaan tuntuu, että kaikki ovat jotenkin jättäneet mut. Ihan yksin. En mä voi sille mitään, että oon näin sairas enkä jaksa lähteä, mennä ja olla järjestämässä niinkuin ennen. Ja ketä on jäänyt jäljelle vaikeina aikoina. Ei ketään?

it was fun.


i met jaana yesterday, she stayed for the night.

i am longing to go to swimming, but this condition is shitty. still snot in the sinuses. still bad feeling.

i think. i think i should do things.

i am off to uni.